Thanks for Nothing, Boss.

by Bb. Maria Klara

Never mix business with pleasure, they said.

After what was done to me, you were ruled by the wrong head.

The notion escaped me, that my body’s not a toy,

Yet I learned from an old man, that boys will be boys.

I own blouses and blazers invaded by your hand,

Leaving scars I can’t see, but feel and misunderstand.

You have instilled in me, a new kind of fear,

Now I don’t know if I can let another man come near.

Some days, I remember, and I wish that I’d burst

like a bubble, ‘cause I hate how I let it all slide at first.

Just a poke, just a pinch, just a joke and a tease...

Backed me into a corner, compromised, I freeze.

Just a job, but I couldn’t face myself in the mirror;

Emotional or psychological, I can’t name the terror.

Until now, I don’t find the strength to self-forgive.

As I scribble these words, I don’t know how I still live.

Did I really put up with it just for the pay,

Only to lick my wounds at the end of each day?

My own silence was deafening, I sank in the horror.

This chapter of my history, now just bones in a drawer.

While Maria Clara never escaped Padre Salvi,

I escaped you and from now on promise that I’ll be

Never again speechless, and live out my truth.

There will always be devils who prey on beauty and youth.

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